Odita Sunday 
By Ewere Okonta
08037383019
eobnewsmedia@gmail.com
www.ewereokontablog.org.ng
There is a dangerous lie many of us grew up believing: “Blood is thicker than water.” Yes, it sounds poetic. It comforts the lazy and excuses the wicked. But let me shock you this morning, not all blood is sacred, and not all strangers are strangers.
Sometimes, the one who shares your DNA shares nothing else with you, not your pain, not your dreams, not your hunger. Meanwhile, somewhere in the marketplace of life, a “stranger” is carrying your burden like it is his birthright.
Even the Holy Book did not hide this truth. When Cain lifted his hand against his own brother Abel, heaven did not say, “But they are brothers.” No! Blood cried from the ground. Wickedness is wickedness, whether it comes wearing family cloth or a friendly smile.
And when David was hunted like an animal by King Saul, it was not Saul’s son that betrayed him, it was Saul himself. Yet, Saul’s son, Jonathan, became David’s shield, his brother not by blood, but by covenant.
Let me say it the African way:
“The brother who breaks your pot is worse than the stranger who steals your goat.”
WHY GOOD FRIENDS ARE SCARCE LIKE RAIN IN HARMATTAN
Good friends are not cheap. If they were, they would be sold in sachets like pure water.
A true friend is:
• Loyal when loyalty is inconvenient
• Honest when lies are easier
• Present when the crowd disappears
• Silent when your secret is heavy
The book of Proverbs says, “There is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.” That is not poetry, that is reality.
But let us not deceive ourselves:
“The goat that follows every shepherd will end up in many soups.”
Good friends are rare because good character is rare. Many people want friendship, but few want the discipline that sustains it.
HOW TO SPOT A GOOD FRIEND (BEFORE LIFE TESTS THEM FOR YOU)
Do not wait for betrayal before you start observing.
A good friend:
• Corrects you privately, not disgrace you publicly
• Celebrates your growth, not competes with your progress
• Does not keep score of your kindness
• Shows up when there is nothing to gain
Watch how they treat people who cannot help them. That is their true résumé.
Remember:
“A man who carries you on his head but mocks you in his heart is digging your grave.”
DO NOT EXPECT ANGELS, YOUR FRIEND IS HUMAN
Let me correct another illusion, your friend is not perfect. If you are looking for a flawless friend, you will die friendless.
Even Peter, the rock, denied Jesus Christ three times. Yet, he was restored.
Friendship is not the absence of flaws, it is the presence of grace.
“If you throw away every cracked pot, you will drink water with your hands.”
Learn to forgive. Learn to communicate. Learn to understand seasons.
HOW TO OIL AND MAINTAIN A GOOD FRIENDSHIP
Friendship is like a car; if you don’t service it, it will embarrass you on the road.
To maintain it:
• Communicate, even when nothing is wrong
• Appreciate, don’t assume they know
• Forgive quickly, don’t keep emotional ledgers
• Support openly, don’t love secretly
African wisdom says:
“The fire you ignore today will burn your roof tomorrow.”
Do not let small issues grow into silent resentment.
WHEN YOUR FRIEND STARTS TURNING ROGUE, OPEN YOUR EYES!
Not every friendship is meant to last forever. Some people are seasonal, like mangoes.
Early warning signs of a bad friend:
• They envy your progress but disguise it as jokes
• They gossip about others, you are next
• They only appear when they need something
• They sabotage quietly while smiling loudly
Let me be blunt:
“The rat that eats your cloth does not do so in the open.”
When you notice these signs, do not be emotional, be strategic.
HOW TO DEAL WITH A BAD FRIEND (WITHOUT BURNING YOUR SOUL)
First, confront with wisdom, not anger.
Second, create boundaries, distance is not hatred.
Third, observe if there is change.
Even the Bible gives room for separation. Abraham and Lot parted ways to preserve peace.
Sometimes, distance is not betrayal, it is survival.
CAN A BAD FRIEND BECOME A GOOD ONE?
Yes, but not by magic.
Transformation requires:
• Self-awareness
• Accountability
• Genuine repentance
• Time-tested consistency
Do not rush to trust again. Even God did not hand leadership back to Peter immediately, there was a process.
“The clay that has been reshaped must still pass through fire.”
FINAL WORD: CHOOSE WISELY OR SUFFER QUIETLY
Life is too short to carry emotional parasites disguised as friends.
If your “brother” is destroying your peace, and your “friend” is building your future, the choice is simple.
Let me leave you with this:
“Do not drink poison because you are thirsty.”
Choose your circle like your life depends on it, because it does.
And if you already have one good friend, just one,
Hold them tight.
They are not common. They are a blessing.
Happy Sunday. Stay wise. Stay discerning. Stay surrounded by truth.
This is the Sunday sermon from my holy pulpit!
Ewere Okonta is the CEO of EOB Media. He is a family values advocate. He writes from the Department of Business Administration, University of Delta, Agbor.
#EOB #sundaysermonwithewere #trend
About the Author
